Topic · 68 posts
Charlotte, the kids, the grandkids, the Bellah brothers and old friends.
First Note: Today is her birthday so I’m sharing something I wrote over 25 years ago. All still true–Charlotte, you are the love of my life. Note: This column appeared first on November 28, 1998 with the following note: Thirty years ago today I married the 1967 Homecoming Queen of Claude (Texas) High School. Today’s…
“If anyone asks where you are going,” wrote Graham, “you may tell him in confidence, whisper the dreadful fact in his ear—‘Honestly, I do not know.’” Graham was talking about his zigzag walks. “This is distinctly not a walk on which to embark with one’s wife,” he added. Why? Why no wife? Maybe it’s because…
In the last blog I wrote about not knowing the highways of the gods when we see them. So how do I intend to give you (and me) eyes to see and bodies to feel the joy of walking? Well, I can’t do it alone. Henry David Thoreau (Walden Pond) said joyful, passionate walking is…
When Kay Kuykendall Rosenmarkle was in her early teens, she had to quit the school basketball team because her mother couldn’t make the daily round-trip drives from their rural home to practices in town. Now, at 76, Kay has resurrected her dream, playing weekly games with the Chapel Hill, North Carolina affiliate of the National…
At 76, my friend John Hudspeth took a job as a dishwasher. Sounds like a retirement horror story, huh? Not really. John says the job has extended his life. I’ll let him explain in his own words, but, first, you should know that he didn’t need the work to pay bills. After 42 years working…
2 comments
Our 53rd wedding anniversary is coming up, and I’m remembering the 50th. We spent a lot of time talking (OK, arguing) about that one. We disagreed about how to celebrate it. My shy, humble wife wanted something small—maybe go out with two couples, maybe one, maybe just us. Her more flamboyant husband wanted a party—a…
Thank God for Louis Armstrong. He saved my Monday. I had woken to the usual weekend news updates—more political unrest, more bad pandemic numbers. And, then, “What a Wonderful World” popped up on my Pandora. Suddenly, I’m seeing “trees so green,” “red roses too,” “skies so blue,” and “friends shaking hands.” What timing! Evidently, I…
· 2 comments
His mother called him Shug (as in “sugar”). So we all did. And we still do—although his size and somewhat rugged appearance don’t fit the name. Picture the Marlboro man with a few more years and a few more pounds. Shug is one of my oldest, best friends. So when he moved back to his…
Wanna make a friend smile during these days of quarantine? My book is not only about retirement. It’s about health, creativity, fun and, yes, hope—no matter how old you are. ANNOUNCING MY ALMOST FREE EBOOK GIVEAWAY Starting Monday, April 6 and for a limited time, I’m almost giving away the e-version of my book. Almost—because…
On February 22, 1732 George Washington was born on a plantation near Fredericksburg, Virginia. And on the same date in 1949, I was born in Canyon. Have always been proud of the association with our first president. As have other friends of mine who share the same birthday. Seems we all grew up having Washington-themed…
My brother Craig loved burned toast. At least, he told Mom he did. For the record, I didn’t believe him. I thought he was just currying favor with the chief cook and chauffeur. Well, it worked. He did seem Mom’s favorite. And she did burn a lot of toast. It’s easy to see why now,…
“Come on Mike; you’ve slept through the carnival.” As I tried to clear the cob webs from my brain, my brother Craig’s words seemed to come from a different world. “Let’s go,” he said, “they’ve already started trick or treating.” Still groggy, I scrambled into my costume. I had missed the town’s Halloween Carnival; I…
“Finally, I will have a war story,” I told myself early yesterday. Seriously, all my friends have them—tales of knee replacement, hip and shoulder replacement, ankle replacement (did you know they replace ankles?). These people spin their yarns with all the drama of war veterans, looking admiringly at one another as they explain in detail…
On Christmas Day, 1959, my brother Craig and I found 410-gauge shotguns under the tree, and we wasted no time taking our first hunting expedition through the field behind our house toward Tierra Blanca Creek. We were looking for jackrabbits, but when we found none, we decided to try our luck with ducks. If you’ve…
Had dinner last night at the Bellah Building on the corner of 15th Street and 5th Avenue in Canyon, so named because Bellah 1927 is written on a large, cement block just below the roof line. R. A. Bellah built the structure when my dad (his grandson) was four years old. He constructed it for…
In 2013, country music legends Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton released what, in their minds, would be the last of their many hit duets. It was named, appropriately, “You Can’t Make Old Friends.” Written by Ryan Hanna King, Caitlyn Smith and Don Schlitz (the latter wrote “The Gambler”), the piece spoke movingly of the kind…
Just thinking of the term gets my heart racing. We’ve traveled by plane, ship and train, but none take the place of a road trip. Which is what we’re doing for the next couple of weeks. In fact, as you read these words, Charlotte and I are somewhere in the high desert of New Mexico…
I’ve got good news and bad news about the book. But, first, let me tell you about my marketing plan. I have a very sophisticated marketing plan for this book, and I thought you might want to see it. Write a book about what eluded me in the first days of retirement. Write about…
I’m going fly fishing next week. My friend Jerry is taking me to his favorite stream in Colorado. I don’t have time for this. There are deadlines for the book, one of our rentals is empty and I have a construction project that is behind schedule. But I’m going anyway. Because, ever since I was…
I’m not an RVer, but, for those of you who are, I think I get it. It’s not only the wanderlust or the nice rigs (nicer than the hotels I visit). I’m betting the greatest appeal is the camaraderie. When I happen on a group of you at a campsite, I hear the same story.…
· 5 comments
It was C’s birthday—last Friday when Charlotte and I ate with two of our favorite couples. C and S and S and L have been our friends for at least 40 years. They represent a group I’ll call my FCM-PCC-EFC friends—the initials coming from three church homes we shared in the ‘70s and ‘80s. With…
· 2 comments
I met my first friends in the summer of 1966 at Hidden Falls Ranch (a Christian youth camp on the Palo Duro). Sure, I had friends growing up in Canyon, but real friends—I believe one needs to be a friend to have one, and before that summer I didn’t know how. To be a friend,…
· 1 comments
Was home sick Monday (chest cold) so I missed the lunch bunch—10 colleagues who have met weekly for nearly 10 years. We’re a dissimilar group. There’s the Shakespearian (with a timely quote for any occasion), the rancher/Karaoke singer, the comedian (who does convincing impersonations of about every administrator AC has had), the grammarian/sorority girl, the…
“I am not aware of any other factor in medicine that has a greater impact on our survival than the healing power of love and intimacy. Not diet, not smoking, not exercise, not stress, not genetics, not drugs, not surgery.” So says Dr. Dean Ornish, a Clinical Fellow at Harvard and author of “Love and…
Had supper Thursday with Chrystelle and baby James. You’ll remember Chrystelle as the young lady from Cameroon who lost her husband last June in a terrible swimming pool accident. After a long trip to her native land to bury her husband and receive comfort from her family, she is back in Amarillo to continue chasing…
· 1 comments
Hiking the canyon road at Hidden Falls Ranch today, I thought of old friends. Not the two-legged kind. I’ve been a program director and executive director at my favorite camp, but my best job there was the first one—wrangler. HFR doesn’t allow trail rides in the Palo Duro anymore. Hasn’t for years. There’s a reason.…
So how does one who has rigorously saved money learn to spend it? It helps to remember the Bible has something to say to hoarders as well as spendthrifts (about building bigger barns to save more and then realizing life is too short to spend it—Luke 12). Our culture has similar stories. Ebenezer Scrooge was…
Chased a thunderstorm yesterday. If you don’t live in our part of Texas, you might not know we’ve had multiple triple-digit days with no relief in sight. So about 1:00 yesterday, Charlotte and I were walking out of a restaurant when we noticed a nice thunderhead in the east. “Too bad,” said my wife (our…
The sunrise this morning reminded me that—with all this change—there are still constants in my life. For instance, today, I’ll teach the Searchers Class at the Methodist church in Canyon, something I began 18 years ago—before teaching at AC. Afterwards, Charlotte and I will eat out—a Sunday tradition and another constant. Then, we’ll make a…
· 1 comments
In my first golf lesson in 50 years, I hit four beauties—they went straight, high and long and made Casey the golf pro smile (he was working wonders with this old man). The problem is I hit a total of 50 balls. Twelve of them (triple the number of beauties) dribbled a few feet off…
Joni, Bill and kids came in from North Carolina today. So, after stopping by the mail box, we’re having a conversation with Jack, age 8. Jack: What number is your mail box? Charlotte: 13. Jack: Why don’t people like that number? Charlotte: I think they consider it unlucky. Jack: Are you unlucky? Charlotte: I don’t…
Chatted with Rodney and Peggy at the 4th of July parade, watched fireworks with Gerry and Darla, and ate dinner last night with Ted and Connie, all of which led me to sit down and write this blog: The best retirement books—the ones that talk about more than just money—say that good friendships are an…
Watching the sunrise from the porch of our new “homeless shelter,” so grateful for little miracles: This place—isolated, spacious, great amenities, a mother-in-law’s addition that just happened to be mother-in-lawless; Generous friends—see above; Skilled craftsmen—met the trim carpenters yesterday; they seem both skilled and fast; An understanding and forgiving soulmate—when my frustration gets mi
One in three 20-somethings will move in any given year. But for the average 50-something, the ratio drops to one in 20. So says Sandra Rosenbloom of the Urban Institute in Washington, DC, who predicts that the great majority of retiring baby boomers will stay put in their present home. I think I know why.…
“Inertia,” says Merriam-Webster, is “a property of matter by which it remains at rest or in uniform motion in the same straight line unless acted upon by some external force.” I’m planning to bookmark this for the next time Charlotte complains about how hard it is to rouse me from an afternoon nap. “Inertia, honey;…
Willance didn’t make it. Went too long without oxygen. That simple. But there’s nothing simple about grief. What can I say? My heart is broken—grief multiplied by all the broken hearts of those who loved Williance. Of course, as a Christian, the feelings are mixed with hope. Williance came from a community who shared a…
· 1 comments
Today is Dad’s birthday. He would have been 93. My dad was my role model. He taught me that true leaders are servants, that giving is a lifestyle and that real encouragers show up when we deserve them least. Today, I’m thinking about what Dad taught about retirement. Because of a late-in-life financial setback, he…
I love naps. Maybe it’s because I grew up in a napping family. My grocer father, my farming uncles and spouses, all took regular siestas after lunch. And if we kids didn’t think we needed one, we had better be quiet while the adults did because discipline was both immediate and painful. Charlotte and I…
Movers will be here today to take our furniture to a storage unit where it will sit until the new place is ready. So tonight Char and I will sleep on a mattress in the living room of an empty house. We’ve done this before (if you see a trend here, it seems we seniors…
It’s a Claude High School letter jacket worn by my wife in 1966 when the Lady Mustangs were Bi-District Champs. And it’s the reason we’re arguing. She wants to throw it away. “I don’t need it, and our kids won’t want it,” she says. “But it’s history,” I say. “One day a little girl will…
Today, I handed back Essay #1. Next week, they’ll give me Essay #2. Two weeks later, they’ll take the midterm. And the week after is Spring Break. Really? What is it about being busy that makes time speed up? Einstein had it partly right: Time not only is relative to the speed of light, but…
We were talking about conclusions, and I told them that the last paragraph needs to be the climax of their essay, that it’s a good place for a well chosen quote, or an epiphany, or a surprise (all epiphanies are surprises, but not all surprises are epiphanies). I said that I’m partial to surprises, and…
Can you imagine how Rip Van Winkle felt after his long nap? I thought about Irving’s protagonist today after visiting Red River with Bob and Craig. In the early ‘60s my dad bought a small grocery-store-ski-rental shop and a jeep touring company in Red River. Then, he sent Bob up to run the store and…
I’m not going to name names, but one of us snores. Loudly. Not as though I didn’t plan ahead—Pandora on the smart phone and earphones. Tomorrow, I’ll buy bigger earphones. Had some of Santa Fe’s best Mexican fare tonight. Tomasita’s in the Depot District. A lady in line (a lengthy one by the way) said…
· 1 comments
The three of us haven’t taken a road trip together in over 50 years—since Craig (then 15) and I (13) traveled to see our brother Bobby (19) at his summer job in Arizona. Bob, who was working as a tour guide at Grand Canyon Caverns near Kingman, had invited us to see the caves and…
Am visiting my youngest child this morning—in his own town, in his own house, with his own family—and it has me thinking. About times with my dad when I was Jeremy’s age. We’d sit out by the pool in Phoenix in the early morning, Dad with his coffee and me, well I never developed the…
· 1 comments
“Live huge.” It’s how Ginny Auer’s husband Troy signed his last letter to her. That happened a little over a year ago when Troy succumbed to a rare form of cancer. According to Ginny, “live huge” was the philosophy her husband lived by. Every day was a time to “suck the marrow from the bones…
They’re the first words that popped up when I googled “What if I miss my train?” It was Monday a couple of weeks ago, I was doing research on traveling by Amtrak and noticed that many trains run late—I mean seriously late, two or three hours late. And then I remembered I had given us…
· 3 comments
Aunt Renna Beth died last night. She was the last living child of Renna and Dick Bellah. Was fitting for her to go after the others. For though neither male nor oldest, she was the leader of her siblings. Certainly, she was toughest, a word Dad used to describe his older sister’s athletic exploits in…
Train whistles. I suppose to most people they’re a warning. To me, they’re a calling. That is, ever since I was a boy, the sound of a train whistle has beckoned me. But it’s stronger than that. Think of Odysseus who had his men tie him to the ship’s mast so he wouldn’t follow the…
Been looking for a new pump to power my waterfall. You see, about 10 years ago, I decided that, since I couldn’t live in Colorado, I’d bring Colorado to live here—in the backyard. So I got three rather large rocks (each weighed over a ton) and positioned them over a pond to get just the…
· 1 comments
This white-haired lady is still turning heads. I’m talking about Charlotte, the former Homecoming Queen who said yes to me 43 years ago. So today was her birthday, and we ate at a fancy Mexican food place where she engaged the male, middle-aged, waiter in typical, warm, West Texas chit chat. He replied in an…
· 2 comments
We’re calling it City Slickers III. You remember the 1991 movie with Billy Crystal where he and two of his pals went on a New Mexico cattle drive. Well, we’re not trailing cattle so there won’t be any stampedes, nor any drunk cowboys shooting wildly into the air (I can’t guarantee that one), but this…
Spent 45 minutes today people watching. Was on Santa Fe’s Guadalupe Street at one of Charlotte’s favorite second-hand stores, so, while she was inside looking for bargains, I sat on a bench outside looking for, well, not really “for,” but “at” people. Below are my notes: Women dress to shop; men don’t. And, while the…
· 5 comments
Everyone should be a grandparent before becoming a parent. Took my oldest granddaughter to dinner last night—just the two of us—and learned a lot. Like what she wants to be when she grows up: A middle school art teacher. “Because I like kids and art,” she told me. Also talked about 7th grade social groups,…
Old Bibles are like old friends. Irreplaceable. Lost mine about a year ago. Not lost it, exactly; I retired it. Was about time. Both front and back covers were gone. Inside pages were coming apart. Some were hopelessly crinkled. “Embarrassing,” said Charlotte, spoken as she rolled her eyes when a page or two drifted to…
· 2 comments
You were our firstborn, which is enough in itself to make you special. But there is much more. From day one you were engaging, even captivating. Strangers thought you could read at three. They didn’t know about your incredible memory. Plus, your ability, even then, to sell an audience. Sometimes it got you and us…
“Ray, you don’t look like you belong on a bicycle; you look like you belong on a horse.” The words belonged to my cousin Sheryl, at whose El Paso house my friend and I were staying on the eve of a 400-mile bicycle relay. Sheryl was right. Ray’s large frame, combined with an equally large…
When my brother Craig was in his 20s, he ran a Christian coffee house on a seedy street in inner-city Dallas. I remember stories of self-proclaimed warlocks with whom he boldly shared the Good News of Jesus. Not long after, Craig moved to Arizona where he lived most of his adult life, much of it…
Saw fireflies last night. We were walking in Crag’s Omaha neighborhood, shortly after sundown, and there they were: a small greenish blinking light in the yard to our left, two others closer and brighter in the street in front of us. Can’t remember seeing fireflies as an adult, nor in West Texas. My sightings were…
· 1 comments
In less than two hours will be on the road. Woohoo! Our 2010 vacation in Ouray, Colorado is about to begin. Will make a side trip first. To Omaha, Nebraska where my brother Craig now lives. Haven’t seen him since June 1 – the day after Dad died. Am bringing Craig some of Mom’s and…
· 2 comments
Dad died this morning, at 4:45 a.m., May 31, 2010, just 13 days short of his 87th birthday. Seems fitting that this WWII veteran should pass on Memorial Day. It’s probably the most important thing his great-grandchildren will remember about him. That he served with honor and bravery to help liberate Europe. I’ll remember it,…
· 1 comments
My brother Craig comes today. Will fly in from Phoenix on the way back to his home in Omaha. Is making the trip to see our dad who is in the hospital in Lubbock. Is ironic that Craig’s visit comes in May. For this time of year holds some of the best memories I have…
· 1 comments
Visited my 86-year-old dad in the hospital yesterday. He’s better; thank you. Have never written about Dad – not anything published, anyway. I think it’s because I know how uncomfortable it would make him feel. But Dad doesn’t read my blog; doesn’t own a computer. So I’m safe. Sergeant Robert A. (Bob) Bellah came ashore…
It was the best April Fool’s Day prank ever. In the mid 80s all the kids were still home; the oldest ones, teenagers. Although April Fool’s jokes were a family tradition, none of mine were particularly creative: “Look outside; it snowed. Three feet.” That worked until the kids got older. Let’s see, about preschool age.…
· 1 comments
“How hard can it be?” Whenever I hear the question, I think of the summer of 2004 when I told my friends why I was going to rent a car for our trip to Oxford, England. Yes, I knew they drive on the left, not the right, side of the road. But I would counter…
On February 22, 1732 George Washington was born on a plantation near Fredericksburg, Virginia. And on the same date in 1949, I was born in Canyon. Have always been proud of the association with our first president. As have other friends of mine who share the same birthday. Seems we all grew up having Washington-themed…
Goodbye. Not a word that I particularly like. But this morning I said it to my youngest daughter and youngest grandchild who will be on their way to North Carolina when I get out of class. Don’t like the word because I don’t like separation. I want family and friends close. OK, maybe not always…